the school of grounded transformation presents

BREAKING CYCLES
begins tuesday, february 25th

Mix of live classes on Zoom and pre-recorded content
(Zooms: Tuesdays at 11am and 5pm Pacific Time/2pm and 8pm Eastern Time)


Buddhist meditation meets Internal Family Systems therapy
to bring fresh insight to why we are the way are
and how to evolve in a self-loving way.


It turns out the parts of us that get entrenched in repetitive cycles (self-judgement, self-medication, looping thoughts, bad habits, emotional repression, emotional overwhelm, conflict in relationships, and so on) are parts of us that are actually trying to keep us safe in some way. We don’t need to fix these patterns or learn to override them—those approaches don’t work long-term. Rather, we need to upgrade our relationship to these parts of ourselves, discover the roots of these patterns, and compassionately explore new options.

This course is an experiential introduction to using the “parts work” of IFS in meditation. You’ll begin engaging with these aspects of your psyche right away while gaining new awareness and tools for continuous growth and healing. This is a trauma-focused course, meaning that we move with an awareness that all patterns in our lives also have some level of pain, shame, and fear associated with them, and that these parts of us (“exiles”) need self-love and self-compassion in order to get unstuck.

You’ll learn how to address our instinctive fear of change, how to address inner conflict and polarization, develop a vision of what a life of mature freedom and happiness looks like for you (it looks different for everybody), and begin taking steps in that direction. You’ll also learn the 6F’s, an approach for working fruitfully with just about any part of you. 

*Flexible payment options and no one turned away for lack of funds.

A mix of self-paced content and weekly live Zoom calls. 

EVERY WEEK YOU’LL GET

  • One or more guided meditations that deepen as we go

  • Pre-recorded dharma talk (20-30 mins)

  • Handout to accompany the talk

  • Reading assignment + journal prompt

  • Online discussion forum moderated by the amazing Tess Felder 

  • Six group Zoom calls with Ralph on Tuesdays

    • Your choice:

      • Evening: 5-6pm PT / 8-9pm ET

      • Mid-day: 11am-12pm PT / 2-3pm ET (Europe-friendly option)

  • All Zoom calls are recorded and shared the next day to course participants

GOOD TO KNOW

  • Ideal time investment: 2 - 4 total hours per week. You’ll be supported in however deep you choose to go (or not go).

  • You do not have to do every single thing offered to get substantial benefit 

  • Optional private sessions with Ralph are available

  • Each module is Six weeks

  • Readings assigned from The Monkey Is the Messenger: Meditation and What Your Busy Mind Is Trying to Tell You by (ahem) Ralph De La Rosa 

NOTE:

BREAKING CYCLES is also Module Two of a full, six-module curriculum.
You can sign up for Breaking Cycles on its own, but you may want to check out the full curriculum.

If you are a “yes” to one or more of the following:

  • You feel stuck, like there’s some piece of the truth you must be missing

  • You like the idea of self-compassion, but experiencing self-compassion is another story

  • You want practices + learning to support your ongoing therapy

  • You’ve been to therapy and needed something more instructive and engaging

  • You’ve tried all the things and still feel half-healed

  • You desire community with folks who are healing and growing like you are 

  • You long for a space that’s non-hierarchical, where your inner wisdom is just as important as anyone else’s and the “teacher” is someone doing the work alongside you

  • You’re a helping professional interested in IFS training (which is best learned experientially)

  • You desire an experiential exploration of Buddha Nature (a.k.a. the heart of compassionate action)

  • You want to begin, refresh, or deepen your meditation practice

    …this is for you

These courses are guided by the following principles:

  • Radical non-pathology: The audacious notion that nothing is wrong with you. You’re not broken, dysfunctional, or neurotic. You had to figure out how to survive and feel emotionally safe in some tough situations, though. You were also born into an emotionally unintelligent society where aggression is normal and conformity is demanded. Whatever’s driving you to this course—be it depression, anxiety, relationship rollercoasters, grief, self-medication cycles, or simply the sense that there must be more—is the product of how you adapted to all this. And it worked. You survived. And it is also an excellent idea to evolve now. 

  • Compassion first: Compassion is the strongest, cleanest fuel for healing and growth. Curiosity is the doorway to removing obstacles and past conditionings. Self-love is the essential nutrient we’re hungry for. If self-shaming and self-punishment worked, you wouldn’t be reading this.

  • Start where you are: Whatever the level (or lack) of trauma, whether you’re a beginning meditator or a fifth-level bodhisattva, we all start in the same place: what it’s like here and now. We all do the same work, even if at different levels of subtlety. And we will all mess up, miss a day, get behind, etc. In these courses, the invitation is to continually accept where we are, and keep going from there. (If you’re getting the vibe that you’re allowed to be utterly human around here, good.)

  • Community amplification: Healing in isolation is one thing, healing with folks who are having their own insights and breakthroughs amplifies our own process—even for introverts who are attached to our pillow forts.

  • Meditation is a must: We all know change comes from within, but how much time do we spend there, within? If we want our lives to evolve, we simply must relate directly to what’s happening inside of us. Meditation offers us a self-governed home base where we can do inner work any time, anywhere, and free of charge. The meditations offered here different. They are an invitation to a kind of self-relationship that’s only available when we spend time inside. Busy minds are welcome here.

If you’ve taken online courses with Ralph before, you can expect a similar approach but with new meditations and new insights. Most of Ralph’s previous courses (Chrysalis and Coming Home in particular) were recorded 2019-2020. Since then, Ralph has continuously studied, practiced, been in therapy, wrote books, casually survived a pandemic, and mentored with Richard Schwartz.

FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

Can trauma really be healed?
Yes. Many people are living proof of this. Just like a broken arm, the pieces of a broken heart can come back together. Just like a virus, the pain and shame can be ejected from the body. And just like with catastrophic illnesses, when healing trauma isn’t possible, it is still possible to grow new awarenesses, develop new skills, discover new choices, and reclaim joy even though there is still difficulty.


What if I can’t make the Zoom calls?

They are recorded and shrewd with the group the next day



What if I can’t or don’t keep up with all the content?
No problem. What matters most is the energy you do put in. There is no judgment, only acceptance and encouragement. If you do fall behind, you can always just pick up right where we are in the course with no pressure to get “caught up.” This path is a tightrope that’s six inches off the ground; easy to fall off, easy to get back on. 

What are private sessions like?
Imagine you go to see a therapist or coach and they already know the meditations you’ve been doing and the process you’ve been using to heal. Private sessions are an opportunity to go deep on a particular area of your life you’re stuck with. They are also an opportunity to ask questions, get recommendations, or explore meditation in a different way. Professional mentorship is also available.


What if I’m broke?
Sliding scale options are offered and if those don’t work for you, just write to Ralph at ralph@ralphdelarosa.com . No one turned away for lack of funds. Ralph was poor most of their life and had to volunteer at meditation centers and ask for financial aid in order to learn. So, no questions asked. Healing belongs to us all.

Is this suitable for beginners to meditation and/or IFS?
Yes.

Is this suitable for experience and advanced practitioners?
Also yes. The integration of Buddhism and IFS Ralph offers is unique (and approved of by Richard Schwartz) and lays bare the essence of both IFS and Buddhism in a unique way. 

Does this course mean doing parts work every day?
No. You’ll be given other grounding meditations to alternate with. 2-3 parts work meditations is usually plenty, and the other meditations are crafted with both maintenance of the work and the need for soft rest in mind.


Are CEUs offered?

Not yet. 


Are there any rules?
Basic decency and abstaining from bigotry. It is crucial that this space be welcoming to all folks, and especially to anyone who feels marginalized and disenfranchised in our society because of their race, gender status, disability, sexual orientation, religion, and so on. We all know what kindness and respect mean. Anything less will be addressed (with care).

I suck at meditation.
Everyone does. As neuroscientist Kelly McGonigal says, “the worse you are at meditation, the better it is for you.” 

No, really, I tried a bunch and it didn’t work for me.
Meditation is the core engine of the self-healing work presented. That said, it is approached in a way that you most likely have not encountered, with a deeper intention behind it than “stress reduction”. You have express permission to let it be messy if that’s what it is. Choose accordingly. If it isn’t for you, I do hope you find what you’re looking for!

Why meditation?
We all know change comes from within, but how much time do you spend there, within? If we want our lives to evolve, we simply must relate directly to what’s happening inside of us. Meditation offers us a self-governed home base where we can do therapeutic self-work any time, anywhere, and free of charge. Again, the meditation offered in this course isn’t stress reduction as we can find in other things like painting or hiking. This is about deep self-relationship and becoming prone to healing experiences and life-altering flashes of insight.